Earthbound

Autumn. In the mornings I wake up to crisp, cool sunrises bursting with colors so earthly they can almost be tasted.

The seasonal blossoms, like fireworks, shoot forth in a brilliant display as if to celebrate the turning of the seasons.

Heavenly hues melt together in a cacophony of delight, echoing the more earthbound array of radiant richness.

The trees, reaching toward the heavens join the dance, and slowly relinquish their adornments. Leaf by leaf, the cool Autumn breezes claim their prizes only to drop them, swirling, to the ground below. Earthbound.

The fallen flora, earthbound, swish and crackle as I follow my path. The path chosen for me.

My path is not perfect, but it is beautiful. It is like no other.

As am I.
Earthbound.

And forever will it be my nature to reach longingly toward the heavens.

And in that very act of reaching, I grow. I learn about the life that is mine,

and to what I am bound. Earthbound... even in the Autumn,

I blossom.

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Follow the Leader

There was an Autumn chill in the air today making it the perfect weather for a game of follow the leader! Can you guess who the leader was?

Here's a short video of the fun. Note how The Skink tries very hard to do exactly what big-sis Iraq does, from skipping to jumping.

And so the game progressed...

But we did not forget to stop and smell the flowers!

:o)

Wordless Wednesday

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Flashback Tuesday!

I came across a video recently that was made well before the beginning of this blog. The reason it came to my mind is that though Iraq often seems so "normal" to others, they don't see everything that happens in our home. In fact, I think it would make for quite an exciting reality show if our house were to be wired with cameras to show all that other people don't see...

Ya gotta see it to believe it!

So - the video in question was taken the day Iraq turned 5. Children with Aspergers often have a difficult time transitioning from one activity to the next and even the smallest changes can cause them to become upset. It sounds so simple in writing, doesn't it?

So on the morning of Iraq's birthday, my husband and I took time before she got up and set up a table with the cake and all her wrapped presents - it was supposed to be a fun surprise. Here's a hint - some children with Aspergers don't do well with surprises... even good ones! Iraq came out of her room, but as soon as we said we had a surprise for her, she high-tailed it back to her room and refused to come out. (Not exactly "typical" behavior.) We spent quite some time trying to entice her out of her room, and finally resorted to physically dragging her out in hopes once she saw the cake and presents, she would become excited. Of course we wanted to have a video of her reaction to all the pretty presents...

And with no further ado, I present a video of Iraq's 5th birthday morning...

What? Doesn't every 5-year-old express this level of excitement over a table full of presents?

These are the kinds of things that are the "norm" in our house. These are the things other people don't see, and if they do see this - say, in WalMart, they might simply assume our child is misbehaving or having a temper-tantrum over some toy we won't get her.

Of course she is improving somewhat over the years - birthdays have become easier at any rate:

Note that although she has actually walked up close to the table full of presents on her 7th birthday, her body language might suggest she still has some fear it could mysteriously develop giant, robotic lobster claws, grab her and consume her whole.

I consider myself quite lucky that my other two children do not fear presents or birthday parties. Still, Iraq's "quirks" and reactions to things that most every other child takes for granted do take their toll on my sanity at times. Blogging is one great outlet for me, but I do have to be in the mood.

My other outlet? As a person who swore she would not allow any of her children to become addicted to any video games... I have become addicted to an on-line horse game where one interacts with other players to buy, breed and show Hunter/Jumper horses. Gotta laugh! from the time I was a tot, I was wildly passionate about horses. With my life as it is today, there is really no time for me to ride as I would like. Since I don't get out much, the social aspect of the game draws me also. And just look at this little guy I bred during the last breeding season!


HuntAndJump.com: Free Horse Genetics Game

And, Ooooooo - you can click the link and join for FREE! And if you do... I get more stuff, even if you don't play :o)  You have NO idea how much that would mean to me - and my sanity!  LOL!

Yes, folks... the secret to my sanity sits on pixelized ponies! But hey - it's much more fun than pulling my hair out!
(and if only 4 more people sign up, I can get spray to make all my horses SHINY!) Happy, happy, happy!

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1... 2... 3... Chicken!

We have a monitor in The Skink's room, and when she goes upstairs to play I get to overhear her conversations with the Little People and all the animals. The one that gave me the giggles yesterday was "1... 2... 3... Chicken!" Then I heard one of the Little People cars racing across the little wooden table in The Skink's room and drop off the edge. "Oh, Chicken. I sorry!" came the little voice over the monitor. "All better? OK, swing!"

These days we get to witness these adorable interchanges between Skink and toy all the time. It's better than T.V.!

And in world news this evening... This morning before school we went to Iraq's psychiatrist. She's a wonderful doctor and full of good insight. We brought up "Beg Mode." I think I *may* have mentioned before that "Beg Mode" strikes fear into the entire family. Amazingly, the doctor had a very fancy name for it - something like "demandaria," or "horrific repetitious begoria" or something, but I can't remember. At any rate, apparently this is something very common in children in the autism spectrum. They sorta get stuck on a particular thought or desire and just can't be redirected by their desperate and unfortunate parents.

Great - but how do we avoid or fix "demandiarrhea?"

The doctor looked us in the eye and simply said "Maybe you could just give her what she wants."

What??

As a parent, it is repetitively beaten into our brains that we must stay consistent, that "No" means "No," and that giving in to begging is the greatest sin there is and is grounds for a one-way ticket to hell! Give her what she wants? Are you kidding me?

No. The doctor was not kidding. If Iraq asks for ice cream just before dinner, tell her she may have one teaspoon of ice cream and may then save the rest until after dinner. If she doesn't want to do her homework, ask her if she would like to choose just some of the homework. If she does two math problems happily and then trots off, two math problems is better than none. If she does none, I get to keep my eyes and skin, and the house is quiet and the damage remains minimal.

I have to admit I felt like a cat getting it's fur rubbed the wrong way... with a rake. But under that feeling was a weird sense of relief... like finally I have permission to NOT wage war at every single intersection along the path of parenthood. Of course - this is NOT advice to be given to the parents of neuro-typical children, and those methods were neither employed with Broadway nor will they be used for The Skink. But Iraq is not Broadway nor is she The Skink, and she requires something very different. Something that will most definitely get us some dirty looks from other parents at WalMart.

You know... I seem to bring up WalMart a lot. I have a love-hate relationship with WalMart. I love WalMart because I can get everything I need in one trip at a price that our family can *almost* afford... but I hate having to deal with the well-meaning-know-it-alls that lurk among the aisles. Those scary, scary well-meaning-know-it-alls.

I think I may have been one of them once, albeit a mostly keep-it-to-myself know-it-all.

When Broadway was small, I knew everything! He was an easy child. I was a consistent parent. He was well behaved which meant I was a wonderful parent, and I knew everything.

And then I had Iraq... and suddenly I didn't know so much. And the older she got, the less I knew. Until now... and now... I know nothing.

Yet I still have to face all the *helpful* people at WalMart who come in all ages. Some are young and some are old. Some have had children and some have 458 grandchildren and none of their children ever behaved like Iraq because they possess the magical secret to parenting, which usually entails a good spanking! Most of them say nothing, but their faces speak volumes! Those bold enough to actually say something receive a polite explanation (that I'm sure many don't understand or believe). Apparently it is possible to discipline or beat autism out of a child... but horrible mother me... I'm not willing to try! And worse yet, unlike my chromosomally enhanced tot, Iraq "just looks so normal." Yup - right up until she starts screeching "PLEEEEEEEEEEEEEZZZ" over some $8 pack of gum that will only end up ground into the fabric of the back seat of our car.

And then there are the people who say, "Well, if you can't handle your children at WalMart, just don't bring them." OK? And when will you be over to babysit? Or would you rather I email my grocery list to you and you can just drop it off on Tuesday? Yeah... gee, sorry... but our staff of nannies and maids have the year off.

Worse yet, now my 15-and-a-half-year-old knows all there is to know about parenting, and points out all my deficiencies in the check-out line.
Broadway: "Mom! You shouldn't let her stand on the end of the cart! Why do you let her get away with so much?"
Me: "because, honey, I have to pick my battles."
Him: "You never let ME get away with doing that!"
Me: "She is not you."
Him: "That's not fair!"
Me: "Life isn't fair. If it were, my teenage son would be helpful and supportive while I stand here loosing my mind instead of trying to hide it for me. Did you take your ADHD pill this morning?"
Him: "Uhhh... well... you still shouldn't spoil her like that!"

And through it all I do my best to hold my head high and tell myself, "I am a parent like no other!"

And if you happen to spot my sanity while you're at WalMart, I'm offering a reward for its return. I believe it may be hiding there behind a pack of $8 gum.

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Imagination Tuesday

This morning started with a beautiful sunrise. This was the kind of sunrise that shouldn't be kept to oneself but shared with friends.

*sigh* Don't you love pretty skies that welcome Autumn like an old, fiery friend? 

Anywhoo - on with my tidbit of the day...

When Iraq was very little, we stocked up on all the neat toys children should have to help foster imagination. We've got the Little People house, the Little People zoo, the Little People fire house, the Little People barnyard... if they made it, we'd probably have the Little People corporate cube farm.

Iraq never played with any of them.
Iraq was more interested in things that looked uniform and that could be easily lined up. See: Line Up!

The Skink, however, has far more typical tastes in play. It makes my heart leap to see her using her imagination to make up little stories as she plays with all the Little People toys now residing in her room.

Once upon a time, there was a lion who needed to go potty really badly. He took his time and went potty,

And then drove away in a fire truck.

On his drive he saw a tasty looking lady on a swing.

Just like her little herd of cows that sleep with her at night, The Skink believes all cows belong in bed!

And this poor cat apparently had a bit too much last night...

Precise People Placement is always a must!

And they all lived happily ever after!

The End.

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Buddy Walk Picnic Day!

Today was the annual Buddy Walk Picnic for our area. Of course The Skink loved the music, and she danced for what seemed like hours.

And even made a song request or two...

And then it was time for the "walk" portion of the Buddy Walk experience, and guess who walked all the way around the track by herself?

Well... with a Buddy, of course.

And we played on the big bounce-houses.

Nobody was left out of the fun!

A wonderful time was had by all, and we came home happy and tired. It's always fun to come home to Mums-Gone-Mad! The mums are truly going crazy to the point where they seem to be climbing right out of the flower beds into the yard.

Hope everyone has had a great weekend!