Just Your Average Perfection

'Tis the season to post pictures of pumpkin patch abundance...

But unfortunately I can't afford the admission fees to any of the pumpkin patches within driving distance (nor can I really afford the gas required by my 17-year-old Suburban to get to any pumpkin patches as the closest is apparently about 50 miles away).

But who am I to allow silly little details like those get in my way? On Sunday morning I called my awesome neighbor and asked if she had any cute neutrals to dress her little one in. I showered and dressed my own girls (yeah - for some reason my 17-year-old son wasn't interested in having his yearly pumpkin patch picture done) and we piled into my car to seek out the "perfect," pumpkin-filled backdrop.

And by "perfect," I mean something without too much garbage... or a landfill... 'cause I'm picky like that!

You know - like trading in "The Great Pumpkin" for "The Totally Average Pumpkin That Happens to Be FREE."

But you know what? You don't have to keep up with the Jones' (or anyone else for that matter) to have a lot of fun and get some really cute seasonal photos! I so often hear or read of someone going over the details of finding the perfect pumpkin patch and dressing the children in the perfect clothes and all the perfection that was their day.

Well - that's great. I'm happy for them and all their perfect glory, but you know what? My life isn't perfect, and I'm perfectly fine with that! So we sought out free places and made the most of them.

So these were some of the shots from the day's impromptu shoot: 

(The above were taken at our local Southern States Feed Store where I regularly buy chicken feed. They were closed but had kindly left some pumpkins and flowers out for our use. Yup - Southern States... it's like Macy's... for rednecks.)

(And these pictures... they were taken at an itty-bitty little park between some train tracks and a warehouse at the edge of the old part of town - Just down from the Southern States!)

And lookee here! We found us a real pumpkin patch...

 

 

At WalMart!

Yup - smack dab in the very front of the store. 

Sure, we got some looks from a few people. Most of them were probably thinking what a great idea we had   :D

And then do you know where we went??

Yes - this is the most perfect place of all! It's right on the property where our rental house (and my neighbor's rental cabin) is. We took our WalMart pumpkins and set them up in front of the barn. 

We had a wonderful time, even though The Skink had a melt down and Iraq almost had a melt down. Even though my neighbor's kid tried to escape underneath that old train in the little old park and my neighbor had to crawl under the train to get her... and I was smart-a$$ enough to take pictures the whole time.

We spent a few dollars on cheap pumpkins and that was it.

It's not about having a perfect life and going the perfect place. It's about making the best of what you already have...

But that's just one woman's opinion!

Happy Fall, Y'all!

Let The Wild Rumpas Start! We've Moved To A Far Off Land

Yeah - I know! It's been a while. Amid the packing, the upheaval and the realities of trying to orchestrate a move (without movers to help us) to a house an hour away the week AFTER school started, I didn't get much of a chance to write.

Things are nowhere near settled just yet, but we are in the house and the kids are in school.

Quick FAQ:

Q: From where to where did you move?
A: We moved from a beautiful, small VA city to the most beautiful part of "the middle of nowhere," VA. (AKA: an hour closer to my hubby's work!)

Q: Why were you living an hour and a half from your husband's work?
A: Hubby was working in a nearby town, but in the infinite wisdom of some brilliant VA politicians, the facility (yes - one of the only fully self-sufficient prisons in the state) was shut down and my hubby was transferred to a facility an hour and a half away.

Q: You're married to a con?
A: No... just a 6'3" guy who describes his job and a Corrections Officer as "Babysitting for a few hundred adult men who act like 5-year-olds but want to be treated like adult men."

Q: Why didn't you move when he got transferred?
A: We absolutely loved the school Iraq and The Skink were attending and wanted to keep them there as long as possible. Unfortunately, "as long as possible" expired last June :(

Q: No movers? Did you do it all with just your husband and son?
A: Nope! We are so lucky to have some amazing friends who took time out of their own lives to pitch in and help us! If it hadn't been for them, we'd probably still be "moving" and not "moved."

Q: Do you mind living in "the middle of nowhere," VA?
A: Mind? I LOVE country living! And the neighbors can't hear Iraq's meltdowns!

Q: Is Iraq having transition issues?
A: Does a bear poop in the woods?

Q: Funniest moving story?
A: The Skink, in hopes of being helpful, found the decorative little box in which are hidden mommy and daddy's "adult toys. She marched through the house with the open box, presented it to me and excitedly squealed, "Happy Birthday!!" Still not sure if the present was the box itself, or the fact that she took it upon herself to empty a bottle of Astroglide over the contents, pre-lubing everything for us. How thoughtful...

Q: How many critters moved with you?
A: One dog, two cats, four guinea fowl and six chickens.

Q: Uh... was there any hope of getting any of your security deposit back after housing a farms' worth of critters in a really nice city house?
A: This momma scrubbed that house so good (yes - I know that's poor grammar - I'm just talkin' country for a minute) that to our shock and consternation we not only received the entire security deposit, but also the "non-refundable" pet deposit for the dog and cats. (Needless to say, we never mentioned "domestic fowl" to the real estate management company.)

Q: What do you think of the new schools? What do the kids think of the schools?
A: To my great glee and Broadway's chagrin, all the kids ride the SAME bus - LOL! I guess when you're picking up kids from all over the "middle of nowhere," you gotta do what you can to conserve gas. We had the option to have the "short bus" pick up The Skink, but we held off to see how she would do on the regular bus. She does great!

The girls' school is fairly new and a very nice building. So far we are very happy with it. Broadway's school is a bit of a culture shock for him after attending a high school with no less than 2,000 students for the last three years. For his senior year, he is going to a school with only about 600 students. I think he may know them all by now :)

Q: How is the unpacking coming?
A: Uggg

Q: You going to unpack more today?
A: Sure... right after I finish working on the new chicken coop that we're fashioning out of an old dog house and some scrap wood left over from the original chicken coop that was on this property until a big storm took out the large tree that stood over the coop and crushed it to smithereens. Once the coop is finished, I can move the 5 chicks that are still living in the house, outside! (And yes - our new landlords are aware of the "domestic fowl :)

Q: You take pictures of everything. Do you have any pictures to share?
A: Nope.

Just kidding!

There is a giant flowering bush just outside the kitchen window. It attracts any number of hummingbirds, butterflies and honey bees.

The new front porch is the perfect place to wait for the big yellow bus to bring the noisy little humans back.

Gunnar is getting prettier by the day. Didn't want another rooster, but he may be too pretty to let go (and he's got a great personality too!).

Mimi and the girls in front of the horse barn.

Mimi and the girls (and a cow) in front of a big oak tree.

Mimi, Mills (Iraq's pet rooster) and Broadway.

Q: Does Mimi live with you?
A: Oh heavens no! Living with our little family could off an unsuspecting grandparent in a matter of days. We want to keep Mimi around for a while, so she and Pop live a safe distance from my Wild Things... but they come visit regularly (at their own risk, of course)  :o)

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Adventures of the Bird Whisperer

This week on "The Bird Whisperer..." 

I was sitting at my computer checking on the weather after the sky had suddenly become quite dark and ominous, when from behind me a small voice said, "Mom?"

I turned around and saw...

"They all wanted to come out!" she stated proudly. Apparently my 9-year-old is practicing for her future in Olympic Poultry Handling!

From left to right: White guinea, pearl guinea, chicken, pearl guinea, my daughter (A.K.A. "The Bird Whisperer"), white guinea.  Imagine how this would look in another month when all those guineas are about the size of house cats.

So while admittedly I was laughing my head off and worried I wouldn't get to my camera fast enough, I was also a little freaked out thinking about what would happen if all 4 guineas suddenly got scared of something - like a raging dust bunny - (because guineas do less-than-brilliant crap like that) and each flew off through the house in a different direction?

I wasn't so worried about Mills the chicken (rooster, actually) because domestic chickens are far less flighty, and Mills is about as mellow as they get. It shouldn't be a surprise to anyone just how mellow Mills is considering he has logged more hours in my middle-kid's lap than in the brooder or bird cage.

Guineas, however, are not quite as domesticated as chickens. They are used to keep bug populations under control and to "alarm" if predators come near the chicken flocks. Since they are notoriously nervous, flighty (and rather stupid) birds, they are perfect rural alarm systems!

So with visions of 4 less-than-brilliant adolescent guineas flying madly about the interior of my house, pooping, I quickly shooed Iraq back upstairs with the birds (right after grabbing my camera, of course).

Yeah - I know what you're thinking! You're thinking, "Gosh - I've been looking for wallpaper just like that for ages now!"

Well, I'm not responsible for the wallpaper (the house is rented) but yes - I shooed Iraq upstairs with all the birds because that's where the bird nursery (Chirpury) has been set up. I keep it pretty clean, so the air doesn't get fowl...  

Initially we thought we'd be moving to the farm this weekend, but sadly those plans didn't work out. In fact we'll only start to move select pieces of furniture on the 20th and the bulk of our junk belongings won't be moved until the weekend of the 24th.

Thankfully, Mimi and Pop happened to have a leftover parrot cage from one of my sister's past pets. Of course now we run the risk of allowing the poultry to grow up believing they are colorful birds of paradise. Farm... Paradise... yeah - pretty much the same thing in my mind! And truth be told, even roosters aren't as loud as Macaws! We'll know for sure if permanent psychological damage has been done if any of the poultry starts talking.

So as it stands, we currently have 4 guineas and one teenage rooster in a parrot cage, and 5 adorable, fluffball chicks (of fancy breeds but unknown genders) in a RubberMaid container. Just one, big, feathery family!

So how does one little girl charm 4 flighty, not-so-domestic birds and one sweet rooster into sitting on her arm... together... and then staying there as she walks down stairs?

I have NO clue in the world.
But Iraq did it, and they all stayed happily on her arm until she got back upstairs and safely into the chirpury. Five little heads craned around while 10 beady, bird-eyes looked about in wonder and curiosity throughout their avian adventure together... it was like birds on a bus! You could practically see the teeny little gears in their tiny little bird brains, turning... turning... turning...

But these particular birds aren't very smart, so maybe those little gears only turned twice...
Or once...

Steve!

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Eat Mor Beef!

With Iraq's new found talent with, and love for chickens, we have added to our flock!

Not to be left out, Broadway wanted his own chicken, provided it was going to be BIG and black! Meet "Steve" - a large, Black Orpington chicken who will mature to be one of our largest chickens, and once he/she gets his/her adult feathers, will be a lovely, shiny black color! Should Steve someday start laying eggs, she will take on the name "Astrid" instead... just because Broadway thinks Vikings are cool.

Next up is a chick added to our flock with some trepidation. This is "Teeny" who may get a new name at some point if Iraq decides to change it, and who may mature to be one of those funny-looking, poufy birds with wild, reggae-esq "hair" upon its small head. Teeny is a Blue Sizzle Bantam... sounds delicious, no? 

The next three are all Swedish Flower Hens. I feel very lucky to have gotten these amazing and beautiful birds. Just 2 years ago (in 2010) there were only about 1,000 of this breed left in the world - living in a small town in the south of Sweden. These chicks should mature to look something like this:

 (Clicking the image will take you to the source & original importer of these beautiful birds)

So with no further ado, I introduce:

And last (and smallest of our Swedes):

And yes - Millie (who we now believe is a "Milton") is doing great, too!

Cheers!

Cheep Medicine

 The last few weeks have been a bit crazy. Like face-eating crazy! Amid the packing for our move, one of my ovaries suddenly decided it wanted to kill me. A few days later a giant wind storm attempted to blow the state of Virginia right off of North American continent and the power went out for almost a week. Making matters worse, the sun blew up, causing a heat wave and 100 degree  temperatures... and we had no electricity (or air conditioning).

 (Checking out the storm damage 2 blocks from our house)

After sleeping in pools of sweat in our own beds the first night of no power, moving the family down to the dungeon basement for the second fun-filled 90 degree night, and spending the horrifically hot day camping out at a McDonald's with playland (and A/C), we got word that the power at Mimi and Pop's house had been restored!

 (Recharging our electronics at McDonald's)

We spent an hour scrambling about in our darkened house, trying to find and pack the necessities to survive a few days away from home. We ended up at Mimi and Pop's house until July 5th when we got word power was back on in our part of town.

Needless to say, all of this change and activity threw Iraq for a giant loop. By the time we got back home and started trying to settle back into our daily summer routine, poor Iraq was wound up tighter than a ball of woolen yarn that had been through 10 very hot dryer cycles.

We had to handle her as we would a grenade with the pin pulled out, and no matter how lightly we tread, we were still subjected to intermittent explosions. She ran away from the therapists that visit throughout the week and erupted in tears at least 4 times every hour. She begged incessantly for random and unnecessary items and her OCD behaviors caused other people's trinkets to disappear and large piles of "stuff" to grow in strange places.

Just when we were about to erect a large billboard advertisement on the highway in hopes of selling our out of control offspring (it's a joke people!) we received word that the guinea fowl babies (keets) we had been waiting for had hatched and we could come pick them up.

This was either going to create a world of excess work for us, or provide a little relief.

We set out to the bird-lady's house after bed time, and once there received a fantastic tour of the incubators, the brooders, the coops and we got to meet lots and lots of chickens of all different, wonderful breeds!

Iraq was enthralled!

Our four, hours-old keets packed up and ready to go, we decided on a last-minute "impulse buy."

The little fluffy chick was like an irresistible nick-knack sparkling from a shelf in a grocery store check out line. And in that one moment of weakness, we may have spent the best $5 ever!

This is Millie, our impulse-buy chick. She was hatched on the 26th of June and she is a Mille Fleur Cochin chicken. As cute as she is today, she could end up looking something like this some day:

(This is not my picture, but one from a breeder of these lovely birds)

This is a bantam (miniature or small) breed of chicken.

Yesterday Iraq spent the entire day nurturing and caring for Millie. Now mind you, this is a kid who thinks "playing" with dolls means arranging them in a perfect row by hair color and that small children (like her sister) are simply an annoyance. She has never before shown this kind of heart-felt empathy and nurturing toward anything or anyone. She has mimicked these behaviors in the past, yet for us it was like looking upon an empty exoskeleton - a cicada shell emotion. 

Now suddenly Millie has made it real.

Every half hour or so, Iraq brings Millie back to eat and drink in her brooder. When Millie is satiated, her peeps can be heard throughout the house, calling her "mommy" back to pick her up again. Millie prefers Iraq's attentions to her warm, cozy, keet-filled brooder.

They read quietly together, they dance together, they talk to each other and they do lots of cuddling. Millie is the sweetest-natured bird I have ever met - content to do what ever Iraq wants to do.

Since yesterday, Iraq has been smiling for hours on end. Suddenly that grenade with the pulled pin has morphed into a kitten lounging in the sunshine. The whole atmosphere within the house has calmed and quieted.

We'll be moving at the end of the month, and Millie will be moving right along with us. Better yet, where we're going there is an active 4-H club. If Iraq turns this new-found enjoyment into a long-term love, she can get involved with so many facets of poultry-raising. There are shows where her "babies" can win awards. She could learn to hatch eggs in an incubator... (can you tell mom's excitement may be running wild about now?)

In the end, it doesn't really matter if chickens become a life-long love or if just having Millie right here, right now is the extent of it. All I know is that Millie has brought out some changes in Iraq - and that this one, tiny, fluffy little chick is helping my daughter grow!

And the keets have been fun, too!

(Iraq with a guinea keet)

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